


Levi's Birthday

by annie_actual



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-01-05
Updated: 2014-01-05
Packaged: 2018-01-07 15:08:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 866
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1121310
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/annie_actual/pseuds/annie_actual
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Erwin and Hanji decide to throw levi a birthday party</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

levi was sUP ER, pissed off today like no t normel pissed of tere was the pee all over him.and erwindmill noticed thet the levi was pissed so he said "h ey rivaibblyboop( das erwins pet name for levi) u wanna have super heardcoore gay sex. leevi lets out a giant giraffe noise. "what the fuck says erwisconsin". levitality make s some more giraffe noises. "im gonna fuck thAt bowl of marcoroni over there" says levi. even tjough the macoronibble doesnt exist hes gonna fuck it. NO!!!!!! hanjuggalo runs in. " DO NOT FUCK THE macorono. 

l eviosa why r u so pissed says hanji. "it is my birthday" levi was now super pissed off because he still cant fuck the macorni" anyways levi is turning 420 years old so they decide to take him out to eat for his birthday.   
hanji and erwichita, kansas start to make a list of who to invite to chuck e cheeses. so far they have mike, erenipple, mikoosa, bertholemew, flynn reiner, mitt romney. "woah hold on a diddly darn secoOND says hanej. WHO IS MITT ROMNESTLE!! "he s obviously the prime minister of new zealand. anyway hanje and erwish so they decide totake a nap.   
erwinner goes to his room to change his clothes. he unzips his pants when the sunny D theme song starts playing. Erwin decided tjat this is not optimal time for changing his clothes and falls asleep. 

PARTY TYME!!  
everyone including levi is at chuckee cheeses. They r all having a good time except reiner pissed himself again and everyones kinda pissed at him cause its not really appropriate to do that in public but whatever u feel. anyways erwind brings in the cake and a bowl of macoroni for levi. "HOLD UP( grab the wall)" ANnie leonhardt skates in wearing a banana costume while carrying a boombox playing the canadian national anthem. "you forgot ur party hats" she hands them all party hats but theey are actually just small pieces of wood carved into penises.

eren knocks over the bowl the macaroni and levi is pissed for real.   
Levineyard starts rapping very loudly, " SloAW DOWN GRAB THE WALL WIGGLE LIKE U TRYNA MAKE UR ASS FAL OFF" . beettholdt is very angered by this because his grandma died for wiggling so ahrd her ass fell of. HE ACCidentally turns into te colossal titen and destroys the chuck e cheeses butthats okay cause no one fucking likes chuck e cheeses i mean their pizza is fucking disgusting trust me i knew someone who worked there.   
AN Y ways erwinchilada carries off levi into the sunset so they can kill titens and probably have gay sex .


	2. the aftermath

CHAPTER 2: THE AFTERMATH

ANYways after levi ran off with erwendsday mikasa was like HEY WILLIAM ( thats what kikasa calls eren). we shiuld open those presents. NOooooooOOOOOOOOOO!!!!! we cannot do that says mike. why not said jean. mike starts to grow into a tree. 

"mike what are you doing", hanji is screaming. I have terminal cancer says mike. ERENipple starts to run around frantically as he cannot cope with the face that mike has terminal cancer. goodbye mike. Its over mike.   
Romney finally shows up to the party late because his crashed and blew up so he went to go buy a new one. in fact romney bought 7 cars and drove all of them at the same time. the romniggle stepped into the room currently dressed as the green ball guy from monsters inc. mike the tree blooms. hanjiggle cries. cries a red river of affection that begins to drown mokusa. 

suddentlu she is saved by one of those presents that float. hOLY SHI T. there is a raft inside of the le present. mikasa is saved. congratulations. 

afTER LIKE 100 hours. theydecide to open te presents without levi. romney decides to go first. he opens a present and its a half eaten box of triscuits. romney dies of dissapointment. there is a consensus among everyone that jean cannot open a present because his dick game is too strong.dick game 2 strong........ 2 dick?? DICK Game 2 stRONng. JEANE is screaming 4 he wants a present.  
Armandarin opens his present next. it is two tickets to a showing of the book of mormon. the showing was 12 years ago. suddenly erwinchilada comes back.. I am here o free u from ur sins. Erwisconsin is now jesus i guess. ANWAYS they all go to heaven. p

So hanjeggle is in heaven right. and theres a bowl of macrorni. ,,,,,,,. and shes like im gonna send this down to levi so he can put his dik in it. levis gonna fuck a heAvenly bowl of macoroni. 

levi is sitting at mcdonalds cause hes hingry and hes eating a giant pile of chicken nugget that mike cooked up even though he is a treeif you aint talkin money i dint1  
wanna talk. levis please stop rapping. he sees this bowl ofq macoronig and just is all like o Hi wanna put my diggly doo in that thing sp he gets up and just fricki b takes it from the fuc kin ground. levi thejn fycKS THE MacIrono and descends to heaven. goodbye levi.


End file.
